Day Seventy-Nine (Opportunity)

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As evidence from my previous entries, my life at the current moment is like a boat floating out in the middle of the ocean. Nothing in any direction as far as the eye can see. A boat, just sitting there, bobbing up and down in the waves. The food supply dying out. My sanity and resolve faltering. No way to go. It’s a shame I haven’t seen Gendry row by while I’m out here. Either way, my life is at a standstill. Today, even, was rather boring. Just some filing and then some television watching and book reading. Same as every other day. Except there was one thing that happened today that brightened my outlook considerably. In addition to scaring the crap out of me.

Today I received an e-mail and a call from two different places to set up an interview. One is a second interview for a job in the Psychology field as a Therapeutic Staff Support team member. The other is an interview for a job in the English Field as a Library Assistant. Both are jobs that could help advance me in one of the two directions that I am currently pursuing. Suddenly two doors have cracked open and I have two interviews set for the exact same day. Talk about going from nothing to everything all at once…Then again, that’s how summer’s have worked for me these past few years. For the most part, they’re slow-moving and boring. Then all of a sudden everything is happening all at once. I have show auditions, reunions, camp counseling, retail work every other day, and two job interviews all lined up for the next two weeks. What. The. Hell.

But this entry is not meant to be a complaint. Opportunity is a brilliant thing. Thinking about all of the possibilities out there is one thing, but having them right in front of me is an entirely different matter. Suddenly the future doesn’t seem so much of a vague idea and more of a terrifying reality. But an exciting one, too. I’ve done my sitting around. It’s time I get back into the game and start making moves again. Life is about taking chances. It’s about making choices and decisions. It’s about taking a leap of faith and hoping things will turn out as they were meant to. “Life’s not a spectator’s sport. If watching is all you’re going to do, you’re going to watch your life go by without you”, a wise Disney film (The Hunchback of Notre Dame) once said.

Opportunities are a gift. They aren’t often presented and they should never be taken for granted. About two summers ago, I auditioned for a play on a whim. I’d lost faith in myself and the world and this was my desparate last shot. The play had a great message, but the people involved in it didn’t help me at all. Then a friend offered me the opportunity to take on a small role in a one act and my life was forever changed. I signed up on tech day, next day was dress rehearsal, and a day later I was performing. I saw an opportunity and, in a moment of “why the fuck not”, I took it. And it was the single best decision I made in the past four years. I didn’t know it until after I’d taken the chance. But I’m so happy that I did.

So what will happen when this summer ends and the chaos dies down? I don’t know. But, what I do know, is that things can change in a split second. I only performed in that play for four days. But it was the turning point of my entire college career. So who knows what happens now? But what I do know is this. I’m not going to let my life be a missed opportunity.

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